It's a very good question. I spent two weeks in Paris with one true companion: my trusty micro-cassette recorder. While exploring the city, I took time to record thoughts and observations at various places, as well as capturing some sounds unique to the city. That's what (the hell) this is.

The sound quality is AWFUL. (It's hard to get digital stereo dolby theaudienceislistening quality on the go with a micro-cassette recorder. The editing of the cassette is AWFUL. There are some background voices early in the tape but these are just incidental non-important coincidental happenings that have nothing to do with anything. Also, I edited out some of the long segments of blank space where I thought I was recording some great music or sound only to later discover that the micro-cassette recorder was, how shall I say it, hearing challenged.

I think the cassette is a good companion to Paris: It's The Cheese as it helps to round out the narrative of my Paris experience. My Paris experience was amazing. I hope you find the bits on the cassette more enjoyable than self indulgent.

If you listen to the cassette with this guide in hand, it may enhance your understanding of what you're listening to.

· 12/21/95 St. Chappelle: A small cathedral located on Isle de la Cité. The reference to chanting music refers to music inaudible on the cassette. Editing is rough here.

· 12/23/95 Sacré Cur: Cathedral in North of Paris overlooking the city. It's the highest point in Paris. I tried to capture nuns singing above while I was walking around the crypt below, but the nuns just don't sing as loud as they used to.

· 12/23/95 Espace de Dali: 11, rue Poulbot. A Salvador Dali gallery and gift shop in Montmartre which is the Artists colony in Paris (also home of the infamous Moulin Rouge, sight of much nakedness.) My recorder actually managed to hear some of the "spacy" music playing in the gallery as well as one of the many audio clips of a man speaking.

· 12/23/95 Chez Les Fondus Restaurant: 17, rue des Trois-Frères, in Montmartre. An excellent fondu restaurant where I again failed to capture the French music from the radio on cassette. Nipples, Nipples, Nipples.

· 12/24-12/25/95 Notre-Dame Cathedral: As a Jew, I felt it my duty to go to the Catholic midnight mass at Notre-Dame. This is relatively listenable-to audio of some of the singing happening as well as a special cameo appearance from the woman standing in front of me singing along.

· 12/27/95 The Louvre: Several minutes of commentary recorded while walking around the world's biggest and least well organized museum. Also included is my declaration to the cassette recorder that it is my true and only friend as it remained with me in Paris while my fictitiousyuppy travel companion returned to the states. This segment ends with a reference to a "carousel" on the historical axis of Paris (which stems in a straight line heading West from the Louvre, through the Tuileries Gardens, past the Place de la Concorde [where the guillotine was], up the Champs Élysées, through the Arc de Triomphe, and ending just at the north-western outskirt of the city at the new Grande Arche de la Dèfense monument) located where the Place de la Concorde is. In fact it was a ferris wheel and NOT a carousel.

· 12/28/95 Versailles: The palace built by the Sun King, Louis IV when the Louvre got a little too...whatever for him. Versailles is the nicest single family residence on the planet. The reference on the cassette to the Goldman house in Encino refers to an ex-girlfriend's house which is also pretty nice.

· 12/28/95 Negro Spirituals Concert: A few words from Eglise St, Germain-des-Près (eglise means church) where I went (like it was a mecca) to see the Negro Spirituals concert I saw advertised on posters all over the city. This segment also includes a portion of the Chur d'Opera Français (Choir of French Opera) singing "Let My People Go".

· 12/30/95 Chantel and Evelyn Sing: A surreptitiously recorded excerpt from a French folk song sung by Evelyn and Chantel. Evelyn is a woman in the Chur d'Opera Français who I met after the Negro Spirituals concert. She invited me to have dinner with her and her friend Chantel. This was recorded in Chantel's apartment not far from the Bastille.

· Unsure of Date / Sax on the Metro: An interesting phenomenon of the Paris Metro is that performers will just get on the trains for a stop or two and play music, perform puppet shows, spout off their political views, or just explain why you should give them money. This is from one of these times when a guy with a saxophone got on the train I was on and started to blow.

· 1/3/96 Rodin Museum: Museum of Impressionist Sculpture Rodin which I visited on my last day in Paris. City-wide sirens sounded at two separate times when I was there. I managed to capture the second time. This segment also includes the FAMOUS cursing-out-of-statue-because-it-can't-do-anything-about-it- because-it's-just-a-statue-segment